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How to Avoid Faux Self-Care and Find Self-Care for Yourself

Avoid burnout and improve relationships with self-care

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As we become more aware of the impacts anxiety and stress can have on our overall well-being, the call for self-care is louder than ever before. For many people, self-care has become another item on their to-do list and an avenue of self-judgment.  

Self-care has risen in popularity on social media platforms with videos showcasing aspirational self-care routines. Since self-care emerged as a medical concept in 2016, perceived ways to do self-care “right” have emerged alongside many more ways to do it “wrong.” Outside pressure can make self-care feel more like a “to-do” item or a luxury to keep up with than an important aspect to maintain overall health and well-being.  

Air purifiers, serums, boutique exercise classes and candles have all been rebranded as the self-care cure to stress, burnout and depression. However, these products alone often do not deliver on their promises. Leaving a yoga class or exiting a bath more stressed than before are examples of someone experiencing the concept of faux self-care. 

Faux self-care can be identified in a few ways. It is often something prescribed from outside yourself and usually describes an activity or a product for purchase. Faux self-care may be rigid, requiring certain activities to be done at certain times. Faux self-care may also tell the consumer that a self-care practice is only complete with a specific product. 

While there is nothing wrong with candles and wellness products, the idea that there are extra purchase requirements and financial expenses self-care can be harmful. Real self-care is something everyone can do regardless of consumer ability.  

Self-care is important for managing stress, lowering the risk of illness and increasing energy. It is something we can all do daily or weekly that focuses on caring for the whole person, such as taking a mindful moment or eating a healthy, satisfying meal.  

With self-care, it’s more important to find out what works for you instead of what others may tell you is “right.” Real self-care is a lifestyle and is not static. Sometimes, real self-care involves eliminating items or activities that do not serve the person, and real self-care will never warrant comparison.  

Self-care looks different for everyone, so it may take each person time to find what they need and enjoy. It’s important to be compassionate along the way. Often, the first step on a self-care journey is setting boundaries to make space for ourself. 

Self-care practices can change from season to season based on what life throws our way. Self-care routines can often be the first thing to go when a challenging situation arises. That’s OK! Reset and try again when you have the time. A good relationship with self-care will help navigate challenging experiences and not add to the stress. 

Five types of self-care and ways to practice

  • Take a pause. Take a moment to ask yourself how you are doing. Then take the next moment to think about what might be helpful. 
  • Seek Support. Reach out to trusted friends, family or therapist to discuss your feelings, concerns and experiences. Immediate support is always available via call, text or video call when you contact the 988 lifeline. 
  • Take a break from screens. Constantly consuming information can be overwhelming. Try taking a walk free of distraction to recenter yourself.  
  • Relaxation techniques. Try deep breathing exercises or focus on your five senses to promote a sense of calm.  
  • Fuel your body with healthy meals and stay hydrated.  A balance of nutritious foods and plenty of water can improve your energy, focus, and overall feeling of wellbeing throughout the day. 
  • Ensure quality sleep. Sleep is essential for our bodies to heal and restore themselves. Avoid late night device time or stressful activities like working out right before bed. Try a nighttime routine to help your body know it’s time to rest. 
  • Nurture relationships. Reach out to connect with your people. Send a text message to say ‘thank you’ or take a moment to check in on someone.  
  • Find quality time. Dedicate time to spend with loved ones, engaging in activities that promote connection, laughter, and shared experiences. 
  • Engage in meaningful activities. Activities such as volunteering or engaging in creative endeavors that align with values can provide a sense of purpose and can help us feel connected to something bigger. 
  • Practice gratitude. Remind yourself daily of things you are grateful for. Be specific and write them down or replay them in your mind. Nothing is too small to mention. 

If you are concerned about your overall well-being or the well-being of a loved one, don’t hesitate to ask for help. Adult & Child’s team has years of experience working with clients of all ages to meet behavioral health needs, no matter the season. Learn more about our services here: Primary Care and Clinic Based Services

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Agency News

A&C 75th Anniversary and Irvington Clinic Grand Opening

Integrated health care is a concept that recognizes how a person’s physical health and behavioral health affect their overall wellness and quality of life. Adult & Child Health celebrated integrated health at a combined celebration of history and growth at its Irvington clinic in Indianapolis April 30.  The event served as both a 75th anniversary celebration for the Adult & Child Health organization, and as a grand opening for the clinic on Washington Avenue, which opened in early 2025.  Adult & Child operates three clinics in Indianapolis and one clinic in Franklin. At the Irvington clinic, primary care providers, psychiatric care providers and licensed therapists see patients in the same building.  “Our goal is to help people live happy and healthier lives and have them be able to succeed in whatever it means for them,” Dr. Christine Negendank, President and Chief Medical Officer at Adult & Child Health said. “Many of our patients have been stigmatized — even in the health care setting — so we are very careful to make sure everyone is welcome here, no matter their circumstance and no matter their level of illness.”  Clients of all ages come to the Irvington clinic for psychiatric and primary care. “Integrated care clients,” as they are called, can come to the Irvington clinic to have multiple needs addressed in one place. It’s a combination of providing the best practices and ease of care for each client.  “It’s so wonderful to see a patient who tells me, ‘I’m out of my blood pressure meds,’ or ‘I have a severe headache,’ and I can say, ‘Well, you know, we have primary care across the hall; why don’t we go get you connected?’” Negendank explained.  A client can get primary care, psychiatric care, therapy and connections to housing programs in a single trip to the Irvington clinic.  “They leave with so much more hope,” Negendank said. “We really try to make it easy for our patients when we can. We offer someone a safe place to come, to feel welcome, to leave feeling better and to leave feeling better about themselves.”  A&C offers addictions treatment at the Irvington clinic. Addictions treatment involves one-on-one therapy, medication assisted treatment (MAT), activities of daily living support, psychoeducation, peer recovery services and case management. The average wait time for a new patient to schedule their first appointment is less than three weeks.  Be Well Bell art installation  The Be Well Community movement is designed to ring in a new narrative about brain health through a variety of programs, including the public display of ceremonial bells that symbolize hope and healing. The bell in Indianapolis was unveiled to the public during Adult & Child’s 75th Anniversary event April 30. Be Well Initiatives works with community partners to bring visibility to the mental wellness movement. The Be Well Bell program offers blank bells to be painted with a meaningful design by an artist(s) or as a community arts project.    Brightli Director of Be Well Initiatives Bailey Pyle, LPC, explained that the art installation includes a QR code that smartphone users can scan to access information on the Be Well program and on mental health services available at Adult & Child in the Indianapolis metro area.  “These aren’t just bells that we’re creating and plopping down into a community, but they are truly reflective of the community in which they exist,” Pyle said. “We know from lots of research that that’s when the bells are the most impactful and meaningful.” The Be Well Bell at the Irvington clinic is the 21st for the program and the first Be Well Bell in Indiana.  Adult & Child Health’s history  Photo Gallery

Sarah Miller, PMHNP-BC

Sarah Miller works with the addictions team, general psychiatry for adolescents and adults, and the competency restoration team. She is board-certified as a Psychiatric Mental Health Nurse Practitioner. Her specialties are working in addictions and with people who experience serious mental illness.

Miller graduated from Indiana University with a psychology degree and went back to school for nursing. She received her nursing degree from Indiana Wesleyan University and worked in a nursing home and also spent time working in a group home with adolescents. She received her master’s degree from Vanderbilt University.

She enjoys hanging out with her family and her two dogs, and going to sporting events.

Joanna Chambers, MD

Dr. Joanna Chambers is a psychiatrist who began seeing Adult & Child Health patients in November 2021. She graduated from Medical College of Georgia with her Doctorate of Medicine in 1996 and completed her residency in psychiatry at Yale University School of Medicine. In addition to bringing a wealth of experience, she currently serves as an associate professor at Indiana University School of Medicine where she teaches Clinical Psychiatry. She is certified in Addiction Medicine and has a special interest in treating pregnant and postpartum women. She is President of the American Academy of Psychoanalysis and Dynamic Psychiatry Organization as well as a sitting member of many medical association boards. Recently, she has won the Residents’ Award for Teaching Excellence in 2020 from Indiana University and has received “Best Doctors Award” in 2010, 2011, and 2014. Dr. Chambers is incredibly active in the medical, academic, and research realms of medicine. She is currently accepting new patients on Wednesdays.